We’ve updated our Terms of Use to reflect our new entity name and address. You can review the changes here.
We’ve updated our Terms of Use. You can review the changes here.

No Way Out

by Dr. Nowt

supported by
Jamie B Sings
Jamie B Sings thumbnail
/
1.
No Way Out 03:56
lyrics
These legs won’t carry me much farther, they’re slashed to fuck and starting to give. In your mother’s words, “it’s getting harder”... and harder, and harder, and harder to live, Adorned with scars on lacerated legs and arms, fractured bones and broken hearts. Is it over yet? No, it’s only just begun. Live and suck and breathe and hate, do it right but do it late. The car’s outside when you are ready. Live and breathe and suck too much and I wish that we could fuck without touching. You’re quaking still; I’m barely there to hold you steady. She’ll never love me ‘cause I’ve got a disease and I don’t want to know, I don’t want to cure it. When she’s not looking I just swallow the heat and I just let it burn and know I deserve it all. There’s nothing I can do to make you see, this is the only thing that’s left inside of me. I left it all behind with so much left to know but it’s gone. And all that’s left for me to do is go. This room is tearing me apart, I found an exit but there’s no way out. Would that I could make a plan but I don’t think that I can anymore there’s no way out. No, there’s one way out. If I don’t pay the toll, it’ll swallow me whole, and I’ll never get out. I don’t know why I do the things I do. It takes it out of me and I take it out on you. I don’t know how, but it’s over now. The best is gone. It’s useless now to carry on and I don’t know where’s left to go. It’s all the same. Every destination shaded grey.
2.
Good Effort... 7 on 10 04:26
lyrics
I designed my own destruction. Opened up my arms. As a crimson red eruption stained my t-shirt I fell into unknown calm. You saw me. As the colour drained from my face, fell away from me and danced with the fibres of the carpet, I smiled a fresh smile and fell in to a trance. You saw me. I didn’t think that it would end this way. You should have seen the look on your face. If I should die in your arms tonight, I can only apologise. I only hope you realise, this is me under my disguise. I’ve worn it every day and night for years now. It just became a fucking mess, just live and hate and fuck the rest. I’ve put on weight since starting this. It’s getting tight around my chest, And I can barely breathe except to scream now. I’ll flush your image from my mind for the strength to end this warfare. And open wide my bloodshot eyes, still stain the clothes that I wear, Red only, and I’ll see you on the other side if we should ever find a way to get there. I’ll keep this up as long as I can keep you in my mind, but I’m just not as strong as you, or as strong as I would like to be.
3.
Drift 01:09
lyrics
Nope
4.
Island 03:59
lyrics
They say that no man is an island but I haven’t seen a soul for days. I’ve been sitting here in silence, just staring at the horizon, waiting for someone to sail by and take me away, Back to civilisation, far from the tide, high up on a hillside, where I can settle into a steady routine to repeat each fucking day, until I die, And return to the earth with a new purpose to serve. But here in Limbo, I’m doing fine. I don’t need anybody and I don’t know what I’m doing and there’s not a lot to do, so to kill the time, I sit in the shallows and wait for the waves to flood my lungs. Then I heave them up as they recede, But the salt remains in my throat and I gasp and choke as I struggle to breath. Now treading water, but running out of reasons to swim, one way or another, I will wash up when the tide comes in. So far removed from my home, the stories start to unfold. But when I’m alone, then I know, One day I’ll go back to the island.
5.
Worthless 00:59
lyrics
I am not worthless. I am not empty, but I can carry myself, Hung off these shoulders, head raised above them, looking straight ahead, Beyond the hate. Beyond the sorrow and the sadness, I can alleviate all that which cripples, And rise on broken bones, shaking off this stunted gait, Returning blood flow to my veins, and function to my senses.
6.
Giant 03:17
lyrics
Against tall tales of dragon scales, our reality pales, Cast in the shade of a ten-foot tall man, dreaming dreams of better days That’ll never come to pass. Is he accepting it at last: he is but 5’10” and his dreams are all just altered memories of his past? What bigger dreams may come when the darkest days are done, In the rays of midnight sun, casting those shadows once again, Of castle walls lain flat. When the battlements collapse, the stones pave way for attack, that will crush the dreams of the hardest men. I tell myself tales taller than the ten foot tall man tells. The tales he tells are ten feet taller than himself. I’ve never met him but I know the guy quite well. We share a likeness and a method meant to quell. When senses fail we find our solace in the wells of fabricated stories we’ve constructed for ourselves. Senses fail and I am entwined in an eternal embrace with the darkness, Facing the farthest face from my eyes, but can I not recognise That the dark is nothing but an absence of light. Is this all I can be? Sustained only by fantasy? Tossed like a ship upon the sea? As life beats on relentless I’m lamenting endlessly: “Give me a reason and consider me gone. There’s nothing more that I can do to carry on, empty as the days are, drained out through these eyes.” When there’s nothing I can do, I shut them tight and you return the blood flow to my veins, the function to my senses. You’re dancing with my senses. When I am so defenceless against this, It’s you. You’re dancing with my senses.
7.
Sink 00:50
lyrics
None here either
8.
One Day 04:00
lyrics
Another day and it might be over. Another day, just scraping by. Another day lucid and sober. Another husk, hollow inside. Another form that won’t cast a shadow. Another push that won’t gain any ground. Another dream mired in tallow. Another tree fall that won’t make a sound. One day when the storms pass over. One day to keep me alive. One day won’t last forever, but I’ll wait forever for that one day to arrive. Another raft that I could be lashed to, cast from the bow of a sinking ship. Another life came close but passed through, made driftwood with no one else to blame for it. One day when the storms passed over. One day when I did it right. One day, then it all got colder. One day ruined when I stepped back outside. One day when the storms gather overhead. One storm that could douse the flames. One ember that keeps on burning, to rekindle the fire on another day.
9.
Old Friend 11:33
lyrics
Old friend, it’s never too soon to see thee again. On you, I know I can depend, old friend. Heal me, if you can. I’ve broken again. We’ve been here before, but this time’s going to be different. You’re not the cause but you’re the catalyst, you’re the only thing that keeps me hanging on. I feel it more than ever. Hope breeds but doubt and fear. I can’t heal and it won’t get better. I can’t go but I can’t stay here. I want to stay here but I’m on the clock. I see her going into toxic shock and I know the cause and how to stop it setting in. Get the fuck out while I can and make myself scarce. If I’m the only casualty, it could be much worse. If I don’t then I’ll only end up regretting it. As the blood flows from my veins, and the function from my senses, I can only see your face, despite all my best efforts, Like a thousand times before, in a million slight expressions. I only wish that there were more. I could keep this up forever, old friend. But there’s nothing for it now, there’s nobody around as the walls crumble to dust and the lights are fading out. I’ve felt this peace before. And I welcome it now...

about

Nearly three years in the making, this album is a great example of either excessive overthinking, or pyar laziness. It's not perfect, but it's finally being released and that is (to me, at least), pretty incredible in itself. Ever the optimist, I have chosen to make an album telling the story of a man's journey to the glory of a successful suicide, beginning deep in his own brand of internal chaos and winding up as he finally manages to join the big orgy in the sky.
I recorded a lot of this at my parents' house in Wigan, where I was living at the time, hoping to finish mixing it and release it a couple of months after I arrived in Canada (I also moved to Canada). I didn't finish it, and ended up having to re-record a lot of guitars and vocals. I fortunately discovered that the Vancouver Central Library has recording studios, so I took to the vocal booths to record vocals (something which I have continued to take advantage of beyond this album). I finally finished mixing it in April, after returning to Wigan briefly, and sent it off to John Harcus (John Harcus Audio Production) to be mastered, just before heading off to Iceland to begin a long and arduous journey, during which, on review I discovered one of the songs could be much better mixed. The master went on hold until this journey ended in July. After a series of events and irritations, the final mix was finished and send off to be mastered in October. I made yet another change to this track, and the final master of the album was promptly delivered. And here it finally is.
As I remember it, the first song I wrote for this album was track 5, "Worthless". I remember going over the lyrics in my head in 2015, in a warehouse I was working at in Melbourne. Though I also remember writing the end of "Giant", which references back to "Worthless", a few months before this, after a night out in Wigan, not long before I left for Australia. I remember singing parts of "No Way Out" to myself in the shower in a hostel in Bangkok. I remember writing odd lines in a notepad in New Zealand, which wound up being dotted about the songs, mainly in "No Way Out". I wrote the small synth-pop sounding clip during the first half of "Old Friend" in a hostel in Sydney, on an app on my tablet. That's the exported audio from the app, and I later decided to base the orchestral part at the start on those few bars. I don't remember when I wrote the guitar part for "Sink", but it was a few years ago at least. There are a lot of bits and pieces in this album, from all sorts of small and big influences. I guess if you take three years to make an album, that's bound to happen.

credits

released November 4, 2018

Mastered by John Harcus

license

tags

about

Dr. Nowt image

Dr. Nowt Manchester, UK

Born at the dank floor of a ceaselessly deepening pit, Dr. Nowt, in his decreasing sanity, haphazardly hurls notes and words together, bellowing out the result upward through the void in the hope that it might reach the surface, even just to the lip of his abode where by chance, one might happen upon his cries and project outward his message of peace, kindness, hope and a distaste for humanity. ... more

contact / help

Contact Dr. Nowt

Streaming and
Download help

Report this album or account

If you like Dr. Nowt, you may also like:

Bandcamp Daily  your guide to the world of Bandcamp

On Bandcamp Radio

Beans joins the show to discuss his album release, "ZWAARD".

listen now